100 Things

1. I’m a little anal about some things. Like the fact that when I’m writing, I always write out numbers. So it’s really bothering me to have the title of this be “100 Things.” I only did it because that’s the way it’s supposed to be. Either that or other people just don’t have this issue.

2. However, numbering a list doesn’t bother me. How weird.

3. I’m a Gemini. My birthday is June 9, 1978. That means I’m smack in the middle of Gemini, and I’m as much a Gemini as possible. I say and do and feel a lot of conflicting things. Probably a psychiatrist would consider labeling me as borderline personality disorder, but it’s just the stars, babe.

4. I have three kids. (Yeah I know you didn’t read my profile. Slacker) Blaze is seven, Diva is four, and Babble is one and a half. They’re GREAT kids, born leaders, creative, gorgeous, rambunctious, and perfect in their imperfections. And they wear me the fuck out.

5. I’m a parent of a different breed. I cuss in front of them, kiss and hug in front of them (actually not anymore, now that I’m single). I don’t mind letting Babble run around without his diaper or if Blaze wants to let his hair grow. I let them be their own person, choose their own style, within reason. On the other hand, though, I DO get stressed out and overwhelmed at least four times a week and turn into a hardass with them. I’m working on that. I don’t like it.

6. Oh. I’m single again. I thought when all this happened I would want to be alone forever. I didn’t want to fall in love again, or be married, EVER again. But… That changed. I am worth being loved, and I know it’ll happen again. As is typical of me, I’ll give it my whole heart, completely, because that’s how I am. I can’t love just a little bit. I love a lot, more than some people, I think. But the right man? Won’t take advantage of that and I know he’s out there.

7. I’m not a very good housekeeper. I really fucking HATE cleaning, especially if I let it go for a day or two because then it becomes such a huge job that I’m overwhelmed and don’t know where to start. Right now the house is just a disaster. I have to say, though, if I didn’t have kids I would be a lot neater. It’s just hard to keep up with mine.

8. My favorite word is “fuck” and all of it’s derivatives. Simply saying “fuck” can mean so many different things, depending on the intonation. I love that. It’s like a Gemini word.

9. I cuss a lot. I don’t think cuss words are bad words because they only have the power we give them. When someone calls me “bitch” I take it as a compliment. It is different, though, when it’s in the middle of a fight and it’s worded “You’re a fucking bitch!” Yeah. That shit pisses me the fuck off.

10. I can get irritated pretty easily, depending on my stress levels, but it takes a LOT to really make me mad. I can’t hold on to it, though. Even times when I should, it just goes. Like now it would be a great time to hold on to my anger at Thomas, but really I just don’t care anymore. Whatever.

11. I’m in love with the Internet and would marry Google if I could. Or Twitter. Or hell, the blog writers I read. I didn’t even have the Internet for most of the last five years, and when I did, it was just to check my bank account or research something. But last year I inadvertently discovered D-o-o-c-e and a whole new world was opened up to me. I thought, “Hey! I could do that!” My mom encouraged me to start a blog to prepare myself to write a book. She told me at least I would be writing. But then I started to get COMMENTS! And I read other peoples blogs and made friends. And was introduced to Twitter. OMG.

12. I’m a Twitter whore. I ADORE Twitter and when it’s down I freak out a little. I tweet more than anyone I know and I’m not ashamed of it. When bad shit happened, my twitter friends were there for me and got me through it. If something funny happens I tweet it and most of the time at least one person replies and thinks it’s funny, too. Or if I’m lonely? My friends are always there for me. My mom has finally accepted that these people ARE real friends, not just nameless, faceless Internet entities. I love my friends. 🙂

13. I’m also a comment whore. If I write something and it doesn’t get comments it makes me a little (more) crazy. I know not everything I write is comment worthy, and I don’t want a bunch of fake ass comments, but it’s really disappointing to me when what I write isn’t comment-worthy. Which reminds me of Seinfeld and Elaine’s sponge-worthy part. I’m totally sponge-worthy, y’all. Nevermind. That’s just kind of weird since I don’t have sperm.

14. I love coffee. I can’t make it through the day without it. I love the taste, aroma, mouth-feel, heat. And of course the fact that it gives me a teensy bit of energy.

15. I smoke a lot and know how bad it is for me. I want to quit, but I don’t know if I ever will.

16. Words mean more than actions to me, even though that’s pretty dumb. If you’re talking about love, of course I want you to SHOW me that you love me, but I need to hear it even more. Or if you say something hurtful to me, then try to act sweet, I still remember the words more.

17. I’m an excellent cook and I love to do it. I haven’t really done it much lately, though. Not real cooking anyway. I love to experiment with different flavors and textures. The kids have pretty refined palates, too. (I’m grinning with pride right now, by the way) I miss having someone to cook for, though. The kids are just as happy with hot dogs and home fries as butterflied and herbed chicken breast, so why make the effort?

18. I’m insecure about almost everything. I know confidence is attractive, and I can fake it pretty well, but on the inside I just DIE about every little thing.

19. I wish I had someone here RIGHT THIS INSTANT to play with my hair. I love to be petted and stroked. A light touch here and there, just a brush of skin on skin, makes me absolutely crazy in a good way. But I don’t really want to be cuddled too much. Don’t smother me or make me feel confined. See? Gemini.

20. I’m very sexual by nature. I like PDA’s. I love to talk about sex and I think the best jokes are about it. I even like the word. Sex. Isn’t that sexy? But I’m not a whore and I can totally live without it (if I have to). I could have had plenty of sex lately, but I’m not into casual sex anymore. I want it to mean something or it’s not worth it

21. I can’t take an Alka-Seltzer Cold tablet without licking it before I drop it in the water. And singing the old jingle… Plop! Plop! Fizz! Fizz! Oh! What a relief it is! I have a thing for jingles. I remember a product based on their song. And I love a good commercial. I’m more likely to mute the actual show on TV than the commercials.

22. I’ve always been a night-owl. I love staying up late, when the world is quiet. Even when I was young, before I had kids, I stayed up at night. When I was in school, I would read until 3 or 4 in the morning, snatch a couple hours of sleep, then pry my eyelids back when my dad would come pounding on my door.

23. In high school I was invisible. I wasn’t a popular girl, or a band geek, or just a geek, or an outsider, or anything. I was just a normal kid. I went through hell in middle school, and got teased an awful lot, but we moved after my freshman year and then everything was okay. I knew a lot of people, and everyone liked me, but I only had a couple of friends.

24. When I was in school, I was a bit of a professional artist. I was always good in art class, and every year I had many pieces in the school art show and won a ribbon or ten I think. My specialty was portraits. I did big black and white pencil drawings for people and the last few I charged $150 each. But then, it got to be too much of a job and I didn’t want to do it anymore.

25. I only like doing things while they interest me. I’d love to be a professional writer but I’m afraid I would lose my joy in it and then it would just be another fucking job.

26. Despite that, I’m very loyal. I bond with friends right away, and it generally takes a lot for me to decide I don’t like a person anymore.

27. I’m a writer. Shut the fuck up. I am. Technically, I write, therefore, I’m a writer. I’m working on my first novel. Geez! You’re going to question everything I say tonight aren’t you?! Fine! I haven’t written anything for the book in about a month now, but it’s not like I’ve put it away. It’s still there, it’s just not talking to me right now. I’ve always been a writer. When I was nine, I think, my class was supposed to write a little story. Mine was around ten pages and involved my teacher meeting her husband and something to do with a hot air balloon. I remember my teacher, Mrs. Fowler, being astounded. I wrote a few stories in high-school, too, and my freshman English teacher tried to get me to get them published. I didn’t though.

28. I love the beach. It’s calming, exhilarating, peaceful, awe-inspiring… It has many, many opposing traits and I love that. It makes me feel small and insignificant, yet somehow, at the same time, a part of the big picture. I love the sound of the waves and the wind in my hair. But the best time to be at the beach is at night. All the loud sun seekers have gone, the heat of the day is coming up from the sand, and if it’s a bright night, you can still see the waves coming in. The sound of the waves is like a beating heart, somehow. Ah. I miss it.

29. I’m a music lover. It plays a huge role in my life and most memories I have are triggered by songs. When I hear a trigger song, I see the exact scene it calls to mind. Not just my feelings at the time. I like pretty much all music to a degree, but the best is rock. Classic rock, new rock, alternative, grunge, punk… Whatever. If it has a lot of guitar and drums and cool lyrics, I’m all over that shit. Especially if it makes me move.

30. I’m a dancer. Not a good dancer, mind you, but I still love it. Don’t ask me to go clubbing, though, because I don’t dance like that. I’m a kitchen dancer. And a car dancer. Heh. Especially at red lights because I don’t have to worry about wrecking. I laugh when I get weird looks because at least I’m having fun and they’re sitting there impatiently. I passed on my love of music and dancing to the kids. It’s funny how their own personalities change the style. Blaze is awkward and off-beat (much like me. Heh), Diva likes ballet and swirling, princess type dancing, and Babble is a head-bopper (also like me. Poor poor kids) and arm shaker.

31. I sing a lot, too. I have my old favorites that run through my head constantly, and I sing them in the shower and all over the house. I’m… Not bad, but not all that good either. Most of the songs I like to sing are by men, for some weird reason, but I can belt out a lot of girl songs if they aren’t too high-pitched. My voice is sort of low for a girl. The best night out for me includes Karaoke, as long as a little alcohol is involved.

32. Ummmm. Hmm. I don’t really like to talk about myself this much. You know how you have a conversation with some people and you wonder when they’re ever going to shut the fuck up about themselves? Probably wouldn’t with me, unless I have a problem or whatever that I need to talk about.

33. I’m sympathetic and empathetic to other people’s problems. I can almost always understand where the other person is coming from. That might be a good quality, but it sure has bitten me in the ass a lot.

34. I want to travel the world one day. It would be nice to see it all, but my first stop, the place that calls to me, is Ireland. I’m not sure why, but it just seems magical to me.

35. I hate to cry. I’m okay with a few tears over a good book, movie, song, or even commercials, but if you make me cry about myself, it pisses me off. And then I cry more. When I do, it’s not pretty. My entire face turns red, especially around my eyes and my nose. I’m not talking about that delicate pink that’s really kind of pretty on some women. I’m talking Rudolph. My eyes, nose, and lips swell up, too. And the swelling takes a full day to go away. So, yeah, if you make me look like that, I’m going to be pissed.

36. I don’t watch much TV anymore, but when I do it’s a comedy or crime-drama. I hate reality TV, though I have been watching a little Big Brother this year. Mostly, I prefer anything that makes me laugh, though.

37. My favorite authors are Stephen King and Dean Koontz, in that order. I’ve read The Stand at least seven times, and absolutely love it. Same with The Talisman. I’d say if I had to pick a favorite book it would be either or those, but I’ve read so many, and loved so many, that I can’t pick favorites. SK is great, but I get a little depressed because the Evil is never really gone, just defeated at the moment. DK is great for that because he calls to my inner-optimist.

38. I’ll read anything, though. From cereal boxes to shampoo bottles, I’m constantly reading. The best gift for me is a book you thought I’d like. I like it all. Except for romance novels. I’ve read them because they were there, but they’re too boilerplate, predictable. Give me suspense or horror or ANYTHING else.

39. I don’t like gift cards as gifts unless it’s someone I’m not very close to. I think a good friend or a loved one should know a person well enough to know what to get them. However, I DO buy them for certain people, like my parents, because they already have everything and it’s hard to pick for them. My mom and I have completely opposite taste, in everything, so she’s almost impossible for me to buy for.

40. I don’t want things or stuff as a general rule. I don’t have to have designer clothes or the very best, most advanced computer/car/phone. I don’t want the biggest house. All I want is the emotions those things are supposed to represent. All I want is love.

41. Obviously I haven’t finished this yet. Deal with it. 😉

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Published on January 2, 2010 at 6:11 am  Leave a Comment  

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